The Simple Life

Big changes have been taking place in the Haines House since my last post. (9 months ago! Eek. Pretend that isn't true...) I mentioned that life was beginning to get a little hectic back in June and did it ever. 

We decided that to sell our little 'half a double' (as they say here in Pennsylvania) and started to look for a single family home on a little piece of property. Of course we thought this transition would happen over time, gradually... One toe into the bath... Taking our time... We listed the house in August and had an offer within 4-6 weeks. Whoa. And then the new owners requested a closing date within 5 weeks of their offer. Double whoa! So we scrambled to get 5 years of married life, a toddler, and our two dogs and cat packed and outta there, all the while looking for a new home. We moved what seemed like an unending pile of junk up to my Mother in Law's house, and my Mom's house as well. 

Jackson loved it though because he loves his grandparents, and my little brother John. Hurricane Sandy came through that first week. Wasn't that fun? Jackson thought so. Plus Nana and Papa Frank have chickens! And of course with one bat of his eyelashes and his best, most pitiful voice, it was easy to milk Mee-Maw and Nana for extra fruit snacks and specially prepared french toast at 5pm.

So after about 6 weeks of commuting back and forth, we found our new house. Yay! While this is the short version of the story, I can say this time was probably one of the most stressful times of my entire life and was really stressful on my marriage. But the Lord got us through it. We came out on the other side stronger.

Our new house is a little rancher which had some important updates (windows, roof, doors etc.) and a great corner lot with a fence for Minnie Girl to run, but on the cosmetic side it has had little done to it since it was built in 1969. Seeing the diamond in the rough,  we decided to roll up our sleeves and get down to business bringing this precious little house into the 21st century. We started doing some painting and other things when all of a sudden life took an unexpected turn...

We closed on our new house on November 20. The week before Thanksgiving I started feeling kinda 'iffy'. Nothing in the world could have prepared me for the shock God had in store for me. Turns out-- surprise! I'm pregnant! It's been a rough road for us with infertility, so it amazed me that so plainly I can see how God directed our path. Out of the most stressful time in my life, God blessed it and brought forth something beautiful and sweet. 

So the little bump in the road has been day-by-day growing into a big bump. In fact, this week I realized my feet have disappeared in the shower. Monday we find out what we are having, boy or girl. Exciting stuff. 

This picture was taken about 4 weeks ago. Since then, the bump and my appetite have taken on a life of their own. (Yuck. I hate that wallpaper in my bathroom. See what I mean about 1969? It's gone now. Yay!)

Needless to say, this has slammed the brakes on the home-sprucing-up plans. Big time. We've been doing small stuff here and there but we have mostly been preparing for me to leave my part time job to be home with Jackson and the new baby. 

Consequently, this has also led to a pinning frenzy on my recipe and homemaking boards on Pinterest. Basically we are getting back to "The Simple Life" or what I like to {lovingly} call, "The Haines Family is Frugal." 

Not that money has ever been a problem per se, but we have slightly more money to count on at the moment than we will in the near future. As a couple we don't have a lot of disagreements, but for us  (like a lot of couples) we have had some  disagreements about spending money. So here is my big plan. I want to be at home. Full time. For good. In order to do that I need to make a lifestyle change. So I've put our house on a budget diet. 

Here is the word God has written on my heart recently;

As for the rich in this present age, charge them not to be haughty, nor to set their hopes on the uncertainty of riches, but on God, who richly provides us with everything to enjoy. They are to do good, to be rich in good works, to be generous and ready to share, thus storing up treasure for themselves as a good foundation for the future, so that they may take hold of that which is truly life. 1 Timothy 6:17- 19

Do not lay up for yourselves treasures on earth, where moth and rust destroy and where thieves break in and steal, but lay up for yourselves treasures in heaven, where neither moth nor rust destroys and where thieves do not break in and steal. For where your treasure is, there your heart will be also. Matthew 6:19-21

The rich rules over the poor, and the borrower is the slave of the lender. Proverbs 22:7

I can't wait to share some of these things with you right here on my blog, and to give you a little preview, I am now:

-Meal Planning and Coupon/ sale shopping at my local grocery store

-Preparing home cooked meals for ALL three meals of the day, ALL seven days of the week. (This seems simple, but for us it's huge!)

-Putting together a budget binder for our house

-Baking my own bread (in my Craigslist breadmaker for $30!!)

-Making my own laundry soap

-Exploring my local library

-Planting our first garden full of yummy veggies, and hopefully a little fruit. 

So far it's been an enriching learning experience, and incredibly refreshing to learn to live with less. To live simply and to love abundantly. So here on EG I will lay down my testimony on how we are going to transition to a Full Time Mom household... Wow. So cool to write that. ...Maybe my life will someday resemble the Proverbs 31 lady. (I can dream can't I?)

I couldn't wait to post about this on EG, but it's been so long I felt I should reintroduce this blog to you and give you an update on my life.

But enough about me...

So how have you been?

Rachel :)

More than a piece of paper

Friends, I apologize for my hiatus from blogging for the last few weeks. Life has been slightly more crazy than normal during this transition to summer. There have been a few obstacles in our family's path-- new health concerns with family members, and we've been making some long term family decisions in other areas. In any case, the Lord has been gently burdening my heart lately with something I want to share with you all.

With "Wedding Season" fully upon us, I wanted to devote a few lines to my wonderful husband and our marriage. This October we will celebrate 5 years of marriage and 8 total years together. It honestly doesn't seem that long at all. Earlier this week  I realized just how young and naive we were when we met. Wow. God has brought us on together on an incredible journey. Lots of laughter and a few tears along the way have bonded us in an unbreakable way. 

We married fairly young, I was among the first of my friends to get married. I was a few days shy of 23, Jason was 25. Of course I thought I knew what marriage was all about. I still had much to learn about relationships and life itself. We've learned these things together, and we are still learning everyday. The good news for me is that I have a wonderful partner. I knew a lot about Jason before our wedding, and I found out more and more after it.  Something we learn in a unique way each day is how to love and serve the other person. 

That's right. I used the "S" word. Serve. I know its not fashionable to admit that "serving" is a part of marriage. I think the school of common thought  nowadays is that we are all independent. We need no one but ourselves, and should please no one but ourselves! For the singleton, this might be a valid point (even thought I could probably make a few convincing arguments to the contrary) I don't think it works in a marriage. At least it doesn't in my marriage. The beauty of marriage is learning to let go of self-serving and embrace spouse-serving. 

The Bible talks about this in this way:

{ And further, submit to one another out of reverence for Christ. For wives, this means submit to your husbands as to the Lord. For a husband is the head of his wife as Christ is the head of the church. He is the Savior of his body, the church. As the church submits to Christ, so you wives should submit to your husbands in everything.

For husbands, this means love your wives, just as Christ loved the church. He gave up his life for her  to make her holy and clean, washed by the cleansing of God’s word...the same way, husbands ought to love their wives as they love their own bodies. For a man who loves his wife actually shows love for himself.  No one hates his own body but feeds and cares for it, just as Christ cares for the church. And we are members of his body. -- Ephesians 5:21-33 }

Our marriage starts with friendship. How do you serve your friend? For Jason and I this is a two way street. It shouldn't be one person solely serving the other. We serve each other in different ways,  that are unique to each of us. Jason does the laundry, because he knows I hate it. This a big way that he serves me as my husband. (Notice: I mentioned laundry above being the breadwinner, supporting me emotionally, etc. That is how important and appreciative I am of this wonderful act.) I try to do little things like favorite dinners (Beef Penne and Arugula) and love notes in his lunch. We are big on thank you's in our house too. It does a lot for showing appreciation for your spouse. 

Not to say that it's always easy. We fight. We argue. We disagree on at least one thing everyday. (Sometimes more than one thing.) It's not easy. I've never heard of an "easy marriage", does anyone have one? At our best times, we laugh it off. At our worst times, we hurt each other. It's not always pretty.We've both have learned the art of compromising. Most importantly: we always forgive. (Forgiveness is what it's all about my friend! Live forgiven! Give forgiveness.)

It really rubs me the wrong way when I hear people minimizing the importance and holiness of marriage, especially with the phrase, "It's only a piece of paper."  To me, if all marriage is to you is a piece of paper, then yes-- that is all it will ever be. (How sad is that statement? Not really the sentiment I would want to hear from my future spouse...)   My marriage is more than a piece of paper. It's a vow between Jason and I, and between us and God. We will love each other and remain faithful to each other for the rest of our lives. We both take it seriously. I think its a pretty special and wonderful way that God has blessed us as human beings. God created woman especially for man, to be his companion-- because He saw it was not good for Man to be alone. 

Five years in, I am hardly an expert on marriage. I can certainly improve in more than one area. Thank God, we both mutually bring love to the table, and all of it is bound together by God. Christ is the glue that holds us together. His example of love and faithfulness is the one we want to follow. Without Him in our life we would be nowhere. 

Faith. Hope. & Love. 

Rachel

Fingerprints of the Creator

It was a whirlwind week down in North Carolina's Outer Banks. I am sitting here at my desk taking in the surreal feeling of being back in reality. It was a wonderful time for fun, family, fabulous food and some amazing sights and sounds.

If you have never been to the Outer Banks, I highly recommend it. It is-- of course, a group of beach towns dedicated to the tourist trade, but everywhere you go-- you are surrounded by some pretty mighty natural wonders. From the delicate scurrying steps of a crab on the beach. To the sound of the sparrow singing at first light in the morning, to the pulling force of the waves around my feet as I stood looking at the ocean-- a still small voice called within my heart... "This is the world I have created." God spoke this world in to existence. By his voice he formed the heavens and the earth.

"In the beginning God created the heavens and the earth. Now the earth was formless and empty, darkness was over the surface of the deep, and the Spirit of God was hovering over the waters.

And God said, “Let there be light,” and there was light. God saw that the light was good, and he separated the light from the darkness." --Genesis 1:1-4

"Who has measured the waters in the hollow of his hand, 

    or with the breadth of his hand marked off the heavens? 

Who has held the dust of the earth in a basket,

    or weighed the mountains on the scales

    and the hills in a balance? 

Who can fathom the Spirit of the Lord...

Do you not know?

    Have you not heard? 

Has it not been told you from the beginning? 

    Have you not understood since the earth was founded? 

He sits enthroned above the circle of the earth,

    and its people are like grasshoppers. 

He stretches out the heavens like a canopy, 

    and spreads them out like a tent to live in."

--Isaiah 40:12-13, 20-22 NIV

I could sit for a thousand years and ponder the awesomeness and power of our God and I will still be unable to comprehend Him. I am helplessly earth bound in my meager human knowledge of God. He is so far above me in knowledge and power. 

Our all powerful and sovereign Lord not only created this wonderful natural world, but formed us in his image with his own hands-- he breathed the breath of life into our lungs. All of our meager knowledge is a gift from Him. Why he chose his Son, who was at his side throughout the creation of this world, to dwell among us is a mystery to me. Thank you Lord. Thank you for your Son. 

"The Lord brought me forth as the first of his works,

    before his deeds of old;

 I was formed long ages ago,

    at the very beginning, when the world came to be.

 When there were no watery depths, I was given birth,

    when there were no springs overflowing with water; 

 before the mountains were settled in place, 

    before the hills, I was given birth, 

 before he made the world or its fields

    or any of the dust of the earth. 

I was there when he set the heavens in place, 

    when he marked out the horizon on the face of the deep,

 when he established the clouds above 

    and fixed securely the fountains of the deep, 

 when he gave the sea its boundary 

    so the waters would not overstep his command, 

and when he marked out the foundations of the earth. 

     Then I was constantly at his side. 

I was filled with delight day after day,

    rejoicing always in his presence,

 rejoicing in his whole world

    and delighting in mankind."

--Proverbs 8:22-31

Have a wonderful Memorial Day everyone! 

Faith. Hope & Love. 

Rachel 

Meditating on Psalm 23

Source: dianabishay.tumblr.com via Rachel on Pinterest

The last couple days at the old Haines homestead have been centered on pre-vacation mayhem.  Why is it that the days leading up to rest and relaxation are filled with break-neck craziness? Is it so you appreciate your vacation more?

A lot of work goes into a vacation. Months of planning. Then of course coordinating ...schedules, budgets, participants. Then as you grow closer to the date... it's packing and purchasing. Stocking up on every kind of paraphernalia imaginable. Everything from beach clothes to the perfect Cars sandpail with matching swim trunks. (Yes, they exist folks! Inherently, this means these items went on Jackson's Cars Internal Tracking Device as soon as they hit the Toys-R-Us shelf...) As we rush around in preparation of heading down to the beach, I have found myself needing a moment to refocus.

Thank you Lord for blessing us. Thank you for allowing us to have two stable jobs that provide for our needs and the luxury of a vacation. Thank you for two stable jobs that allow us to have time off and much needed time together as a family. 

Today I sat down and read through Psalm 23. It's pretty well known-- as with many well known scriptures, sometimes I find myself thinking, "I know that scripture, I'll just skim over it." Isn't that sad? God's holy word is meant to be absorbed, savored, meditated on. If you haven't savored Psalm 23 lately read with me:

¹The Lord is myshepherd;

    I have all that I need.

² He lets me rest in green meadows;

    he leads me beside peaceful streams.

³     He renews my strength.

He guides me along right paths,

    bringing honor to his name.

⁴ Even when I walk

    through the darkest valley,

I will not be afraid,

    for you are close beside me.

Your rod and your staff

    protect and comfort me.

⁵ You prepare a feast for me

    in the presence of my enemies.

You honor me by anointing my head with oil.

    My cup overflows with blessings.

⁶ Surely your goodness and unfailing love will pursue me

    all the days of my life,

and I will live in the house of the Lord

    forever.

That Psalm is water to a thirsty soul. It refreshes and quenches my parched heart. 

...Revive me Lord.

I hope you will take sometime time out of your busy, crazy life for yourself today.  Grab a glass of iced tea-- or better yet-- iced coffee! Enjoy the beautiful sunshine outside and meditate on your favorite scripture.  Focus in on the One who gives rest to those who seek Him, whose burden is light, and whose yoke is easy to bear. 

Seek Him today and you will surely find Him. 

Faith. Hope & Love. 

Rachel

JOY rhymes with BOY: Your "Phlog" for the week

"I prayed for this child, and the Lord has granted me what I asked of him."      1 Samuel 1:27 

This is the story of the cutest little boy that ever was.  

"Sheeeeeeeese!"

I wish I could say he was looking into the beautiful blue sky or something equally as mystical-magical. He was really gazing at my Mom's garage door.

  

"What's that Mom? You can't resist this face? Hmm...  
How do I get you in the car to the toy store and which Cars matchbox am I missing..."

What's a word for something you love, that brings you joy like nothing else? 
Oh, yes. 
Jackson.

Running the race.

Growing up I was one of those kids who had to try every after school and weekend activity that one could possibly be involved in. God bless my parents, especially my Mother, who carted me here and there for dance classes, gymnastics, horseback riding, and endured my at home flute recitals.  One summer when I was about 8 or 9 years old, my parents let me join the swim team for the township that we lived in. A couple of times a week my Mom would take me to the community pool and I would spend an hour or two swimming with other kids, learning different swimming techniques in preparation for a big swim meet which was to take place at our pool.

Now, I am not Michael Phelps, but I am a pretty decent swimmer. I was fairly confident of my swimming skills leading up to the day of the big swim meet. I can remember my parents taking me to the pool that afternoon and it being absolutely packed with parents and swimmers. I was supposed to swim the 100 meter butterfly.  I remember I was so nervous about competing with the other kids as I watched the different races leading up to mine. Before I knew it I was up on the starting block, scared to death! I really wanted to win that race. I remember the signal to go and diving in. I swam with all my heart and pushed my body to swim like I never had before. I just remember swimming as fast as I could push my body (and it wasn't that fast) to the other end of the lane. All the while I was feeling so much resistance from the water and all of the adrenaline in my body. As I came closer to the end of the pool, I saw my parents waiting there cheering me on. I touched the end of the pool, absolutely exhausted. I remember my Mom and Dad fishing me out of the pool and just collapsing. I burst into tears. I came in dead last. That race had taken every bit of my energy, physically and emotionally. That memory is so vivid to me almost 20 years later. It didn't matter how hard I prepared for that race, the amount of exhaustion I felt completely caught me off guard and left me empty.

I was reminded of this memory just a few days ago. I went through a pretty traumatic loss a few weeks ago and even though I prepared myself that there was a chance it might happen, it completely drained me physically and emotionally. I felt such significant loss that I just could do nothing but call out to my God in prayer. Have you ever been so spiritually weak that you can't even form words for help? Only your heart can cry out, "God, please. Save me! Help me! Comfort me!" As I have recovered over the last few weeks my heart has cried out so many times to God. How much longer do I have to keep running this race? Life is hard, and is so bitter and exhausting. I'm tired!

Somewhere in the deepest part of my soul I have a sense of longing. A realization that this world is not my home. This isn't the way life is truly meant to be lived. What I mean by that statement is, this life, the one that we are living right now is challenging. There are wonderful, sweet, blessed-by-God moments in it. But there is so much to drag us down. Especially in regards to sin. When man fell in sin, life as all humans would come to know it changed dramatically. God's plan for the way life would be lived was changed by our sin. As Christians, Christ has secured our new life in heaven through his finished work on the cross. There is another life after this one, and we will finally get the chance to live life as God meant it to be experienced. In the meantime, the race we are running now is one of endurance. Hebrews describes the race this way;

"Therefore, since we are surrounded by such a huge crowd of witnesses to the life of faith, let us strip off every weight that slows us down, especially the sin that so easily trips us up. And let us run with endurance the race God has set before us. We do this by keeping our eyes on Jesus, the champion who initiates and perfects our faith. Because of the joy awaiting him, he endured the cross, disregarding its shame. Now he is seated in the place of honor beside God’s throne. Think of all the hostility he endured from sinful people; then you won’t become weary and give up. After all, you have not yet given your lives in your struggle against sin." --Hebrews 12:1-4

When you feel like you can't go another step in the race of life, when you feel like you can swim another stroke... look to the end of your lane. Just as my parents were there cheering me on that summer afternoon-- there stands Christ Jesus, our Savior and Redeemer. Cheering us on, encouraging us to keep on going. When life is pulling you down, and you are swimming in resistance-- keep going. Because I am confident that at the end of this race, at the end of this life-- Jesus is going to pull us out of the water. We will collapse into the arms of Him who ran the race before we even set two feet upon the earth. He carried a cross of sin to Calvary, he died feeling more physically and emotionally drained than we can possibly imagine. Just as Christ rose and triumphed over death, so too will we rise in Christ. Because of Jesus, we will triumph at the end of the race.

I find comfort in this scripture which Paul wrote in Philippians,

"...For God’s way of making us right with himself depends on faith. I want to know Christ and experience the mighty power that raised him from the dead. I want to suffer with him, sharing in his death, so that one way or another I will experience the resurrection from the dead! I don’t mean to say that I have already achieved these things or that I have already reached perfection. But I press on to possess that perfection for which Christ Jesus first possessed me. No, dear brothers and sisters, I have not achieved it, but I focus on this one thing: Forgetting the past and looking forward to what lies ahead, I press on to reach the end of the race and receive the heavenly prize for which God, through Christ Jesus, is calling us." --Philippians 3:9-14

Instead of losing myself in grief and letting this life weigh me down, I choose to put my faith in Jesus Christ. The author and perfecter of my faith. I am going to leave the past in the past, and take a step forward. One day this life is going to be over and I will fall into my Savior's embrace. I will rise. I will live life the way God meant life to be lived. There will be no more tears in heaven, no more sorrow and those of us who have mourned in this life will be comforted. Those who were last in this life will be first in heaven. Amen.

Until then, it's time to stand and finish the race with the strength I borrow from my Lord and Savior.

Faith. Hope & Love.

Rachel

Our family tree.

Recently I started researching some family history through Ancestry.com and the Delaware County Library System's online newspaper archive. I mentioned before that as a child my Dad was fostered in an Italian home by wonderful Italian parents. But there has always been that question mark on my Dad's biological side.

I've started to piece together little bits here and there about their lives. One of the more surprising things I have uncovered is that my great grandmother Eva's name appears on a roster for a group home for girls in 1910. Her father had passed away when she was very young, and while her mother was still living, both her and her sister were separated into different homes. I don't know what the circumstances surrounding this event were exactly, but it totally blew me away. My Dad and his brother and three sisters were placed in a Catholic orphanage when they were very young. After a period of living in the orphanage my Dad, Uncle Joe and Aunt Mary went to live with the Borrelli's and my Aunt Cathy and Aunt Theresa were placed in a different home.

I remember my Grandmom Borrelli saying to me that she brought my Dad, Uncle Joe, and Aunt Mary to visit their biological grandparents and that they were very kind people. On one of the visits they commented to my Grandmom Borrelli that they knew that the kids were truly happy and loved because my Grandmom and Grandpop would stop and get ice cream cones on the way to visit. When the kids would get there they would have ice cream all over their faces. I don't know if this would be the Worrell side of the family, but I have a hunch that it was. It made me wonder what Eva would have thought of the children being in this situation, being that she went through something very similar. 

One thing that has been playing in the background of my thoughts through this whole process is, as humans, and as parents-- we aren't always the most reliable creatures are we? I am blessed with wonderful responsible and loving parents-- praise God! But there is something so tragic to me that two generations of my family went through something so painful. I can't imagine being in an orphanage and feeling alone in the world and abandoned. Maybe you've been through this, or know someone who has. It's difficult even now-- 40 years later-- for my Dad to talk about it. Maybe you haven't been in an orphanage-- but maybe your parents weren't the best. Maybe you have been abandoned emotionally by a parent, a spouse, or another family member. 

We are promised in Ephesians chapter 1;

"In him we were also chosen, having been predestined according to the plan of him who works out everything in conformity with the purpose of his will, in order that we, who were the first to put our hope in Christ, might be for the praise of his glory. And you also were included in Christ when you heard the message of truth, the gospel of your salvation. When you believed, you were marked in him with a seal, the promised Holy Spirit, who is a deposit guaranteeing our inheritance until the redemption of those who are God’s possession—to the praise of his glory." --Ephesians 1:11-14

God chose YOU. He chose me-- Rachel! He wasn't stuck with me... he chose me! And not only did choose me, but he is giving me an inheritance! And to top it all off, he has given me the gift of His Holy Spirit to indwell in me, which is my guarantee until He comes for me to bring me home. 

How about this-- from Romans 8;

"For those who are led by the Spirit of God are the children of God. The Spirit you received does not make you slaves, so that you live in fear again; rather, the Spirit you received brought about your adoption to sonship. And by him we cry, “Abba, Father.” The Spirit himself testifies with our spirit that we are God’s children. Now if we are children, then we are heirs —heirs of God and co-heirs with Christ, if indeed we share in his sufferings in order that we may also share in his glory...  And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose. For those God foreknew he also predestined to be conformed to the image of his Son, that he might be the firstborn among many brothers and sisters.  And those he predestined, he also called; those he called, he also justified; those he justified, he also glorified." --Romans 8:14-17, 28-30.

As Christians, we are Children of the most high God. Jesus is the Way, the Truth, and the Life-- and that's exactly what Christ through his sacrifice on the cross has done. He has cleared the way for us to be with our true Father and to have eternal life. Our Father who chose us before the creation of the whole world as his own. And because Christ has sent the Holy Spirit to us as Christians, we can call out to him, "Abba! Father!" Not only that, Christ-- God's one and only Son-- is the firstborn among us, brothers and sisters and co-heirs with Christ! To me that is just mind blowing. I have a Wayne and Garth "We're not worthy!" moment when I read that. But that is the truth, we ARE made worthy by Christ and His finished work on the cross! And as Christians we are now member's of God's family with many Brothers and Sisters in Christ.

As you read this, the one thing that I hope you will keep in mind is, where your Earthly family has failed you-- your Heavenly Father WILL NOT. He is ALWAYS with you. He will never leave you, or abandoned you. You cannot push him too far away. He is a wonderful, loving and patient Father who is faithful to you.

Faith. Hope & Love.

Rachel